London, Cardiff, Leeds, and the Oxford Comma

I’ve been travelling a bit, lately, and not all of it has been touring for work. Some of it has been sheerly for pleasure. (Well, work can be sheer pleasure, as well!)

I recently went to a little two-day metal “festival” in Cardiff. It was at a fantastic venue called Fuel Rock Club very close to the Castle in the centre of the town.


I had originally planned to stay the week in Cardiff and work there as a tour stop, but the lure of London was too great and so I only came for the weekend. My train from London to Wales was very slow as it wound all over the countryside, practically circling Swinton. At least I was able to upgrade to first class for £15 and enjoyed the passing scenery in comfort. I even got a good look at one of the Wiltshire white horses, but not the truly ancient one.

I thought Cardiff itself was fantastic. The narrow ancient streets converted into Victorian shopping arcades were beautiful and I discovered a place that does proper, authentic New York subs. The New York Deli in the High Street Arcade is run by an American woman who has her pastrami and corned beef specially made to be the Real Deal and their sandwiches – washed down with root beer – are delicious. They are also ridiculously large to the point of being difficult to eat. I got cole slaw up my nose with every bite, but it was worth it.


The festival was great fun. I saw a few familiar faces from other gigs around Britain, and a few of my friends’ bands played it so I felt totally at home. For me, the highlight of the weekend was Desecration’s headline set on Saturday. Classic, awesome Welsh death metal! And Fuel is a wonderful little pub. The only drawback was some sort of drainage problems on Womanby street that gave off a pretty awful stench of sewage whenever you went outside. Luckily, I am a non-smoker so I didn’t have to stand outside very often!

I really enjoyed my train ride back up to Manchester, as I saw a lot of “How Green Was My Valley” scenery through the South of Wales. Going through Hereford was a treat, as well. I used to live in Gloucester and always thought that Herefordshire was the loveliest place… it’s like time has bypassed that little corner of England and there’s something about the red brick parsonages and rolling green hills that has an almost soporific effect on me. I really want to get back down there again, soon.

In the meantime, I have a second visit to Liverpool planned for this week. My first visit was pretty successful. Although nothing like as busy as London, I thought I did well there, especially considering the week I was there was before Easter and a great many schools were on holiday. I love Liverpool and go there frequently for gigs. Staying there for several days gives me an opportunity to see more of the town. Even though I tend to be very disciplined when I tour and rarely leave the hotel, I make a point of getting out for a nice meal or walk to a pub and I am gagging to pay a second visit to the Walker Art Gallery. What a fantastic museum!


I had planned to visit Leeds in the middle of May but a friend of mine went and encountered disaster. The hotel I’d booked – a chain for which I have a loyalty card and a hotel that has long been considered very easy to work from – has suddenly installed keycard locks blocking the lifts! My friend had paid in advance (very tempting to do when the rates are so much better) and so she was out of pocket with no place to work. She chose to pay for another hotel and so ended up only slightly in profit for the week. While I could also book the same second hotel she did, she felt that the business was a bit slow. A few other girls have had similar disappointing tours of Leeds and so I decided to cancel my booking and go to Oxford, instead. I have a friend who does well there. Plus, I’ve always wanted to see the town and I’m excited about my hotel, which is a nice one located a bit out in the countryside on the river. I don’t know how much site-seeing I’ll get to do, but I anticipate at least a couple of nice walks or runs along the river.

Working as an escort should be fun, and I am really enjoying touring. It’s great to have my base in Manchester, where I can offer incalls from my own flat in the city centre, but I’ve been bitten by the touring bug and I anticipate a lot more travel in my future.

I picked a good week to stay home!

I caught a cold when I was in London and figured I would take a couple of days off. Then the bad weather hit and I saw no point in fighting traffic to make it into the city centre. So I have had a nice, long rest at home. I rarely take holidays. I may nip off to a festival and I will certainly take a day off if I feel ill, but I guess being American means that I haven’t ever really gotten that sense of entitlement to four weeks vacation every year. I think it’s a great thing about UK culture – I just didn’t grow up thinking that way and so I never really do it, myself. I feel sort of guilty for not working, to be honest. I guess if I were on salary I wouldn’t feel that way but I feel as if I should be working and putting more money in the bank. That’s why this was a good week to stay at home: with the bad weather I probably wouldn’t have had many bookings, anyway.

I think it’s good for us to take time away from our jobs and so I didn’t even have my phone number displayed this week. I checked emails once a day or so but that’s it. I did, however, spend some time thinking about things I can do to improve my services. I also gave some thought to how complacent I have become in relying entirely upon Adultwork for my business. I think AW is the best site for sexworkers and clients in the UK to find one another, but it’s important to think beyond this cozy bubble and be prepared for anything. If something happens to Adultwork, then it’s good to have other measures in place.

I had a nice chat with someone at Pleasure to Meet You on Twitter about this a couple of days ago. PTMU is a new escort directory that is somehow related to Vivastreet (I’m not entirely sure how but I think they are “sister sites.”) It’s free to post on and allows for more detailed information on services and rates than the very expensive Vivastreet does. We chatted about the challenges of getting the directory known about and what it will take to break the near monopoly Adultwork currently has. I do think AW is a good site, and I appreciate that I don’t have to pay anything to be on there (sales of my private gallery cover the small charges for displaying my phone number or “Available Today”) but they currently have too much power over the scene in the UK. I think PTMU is visually more attractive, easier to navigate, and I like how all it takes to bump my profile up the page is to post a status update. However, if it truly does take off then there will be the usual problems of scam artists, etc. that plague Adultwork and any other popular directory.

One issue that I have with Vivastreet will also need to be addressed by PTMU: independent escorts and agency girls should be in separate areas. I don’t like my profile buried in a pile of glossy photoshopped agency photos and I know that many clients would rather not deal with an agency. Vivastreet would be better value for money if they were segregated in that way.

I have had some good results with, although only in Manchester. I paid for a small ad for my time in London and found it too costly to pay to have it reposted regularly to the top of that hot mess of a page.

I’ve been working on my website a bit this week. I would like to blog more on it, especially as I would be able to share links and I would like that blog to be more personal. I have never paid to show a link to my website on my AW profile before, assuming that everything a potential client wants to know will already be on my profile here. But I am going to look into that and see if that doesn’t get some people following my blog and social media accounts.

Speaking of social media… I had a couple of glasses of wine at dinner earlier in the week and ended up buying a Selfie Stick! (For those who don’t know what that is, it’s a pole with a bluetooth button in the handle that allows one to take selfies with their phones from about a metre away.) I know it’s a silly thing but I would like to be able to post new photos easily and I think it could be handy and fun to have. I may even start an Instagram account to go along with my Twitter account. Hopefully I’ll have something to share in the next couple of days. You may find some of them on my Gallery.

I am attending a conference tomorrow in Manchester on “Policy, Policing and Protection” of sexwork being put on by the UK National Sexworkers Project. It is billed as:

An informative and lively event looking at the BIG debate on criminalisation and how the law affects the safety of sex workers, the ability of Police to offer protection and the impact on Health and Social Care providers when delivering services.

Unfortunately, I will only be able to attend in the morning as I will be available for bookings in the afternoon. If I hadn’t taken last week off, I would have been happy to stay all day. But I hope to meet a few people and get some information on what is going on in regards to policy and proposed changes to the law.

And here is the paragraph I put in for the search engines to find: This paragraph talks about how I’m an Escort in Manchester. That is to say, an independent Manchester escort, prized among the many Manchester independent escorts and offering incalls in Manchester city centre as well as outcalls in Manchester because that is what escorts who work in Manchester tend to do. I don’t know if this paragraph actually works but someone told me to do that. They said, “Kimberly, one of the keys to getting your website of blog up in the search rankings is to put the search terms you need all over every page and update these pages frequently.” I said, “OK, then, I will do that. I will bang on and on about how I am an escort in Manchester who does incalls. I will think of the various search terms someone might use if they were looking for an escort like me – that is to say, tall escort in Manchester who is independent – or maybe they just type in something like “someone who will please drain my balls in Manchester” or even “escorts who talk too damn much in Manchester.” I really don’t know what search terms they may use but I will do all in my power for them to find me.” And so there you go.

Resolved to have a Happy New Year

I’ve never been one to make New Year’s resolutions, but there’s something about the fresh start of a new year – be it the calendar date or the solstice/holidays – that puts me in a mind of evaluating what I’m doing and thinking of things I can change for the better.

My first year was about learning what works for me and what works for my clients. I have received plenty of positive feedback, but I have also gotten some critical feedback that, while discomfiting, really did help me to improve my services. I don’t see the point of doing a job unless I’m going to do it to the best of my abilities. Yes, I do find sex with strangers fun and interesting, but if I’m not continually seeking ways to do new and interesting things, I will start to become bored and then the fun will leach out of the experience. And if I’m not having fun, chances are neither are you!

Things that I have done to improve customer satisfaction:

1. Lots of new outfits and lingerie. For a little while, I found it off-putting to get requests on how to dress. It seemed to me that being asked to wear very specific things (often things I don’t even own, and at short notice) was somehow infringing on my autonomy and detracting from a service based on spontaneous expression of my sexuality. But after giving it some thought I decided to embrace this and make creatively meeting fantasies and requests part of my sexuality. Yes, changing into suspenders and stockings at short notice can be a faff (the greater the hurry, the more twisted the straps!) but having a variety of things that make me feel sexy on hand and seeing them as part of my sexual expression makes it fun. And if I don’t have something to hand or there’s no time to lace up the corset, then I will just say so without any guilt. Clients are almost always understanding!

2. Lots of new toys. I don’t actually care for masturbating with a vibrator when I’m enjoying myself alone. I’m happy with just my hands. But bringing toys into mutual play has been a lot of fun. And my toys aren’t just things that go “bzzzz” – I also have a few things to tickle, pinch, or smack with and it’s a real kick to see how clients respond to these things (when they want them!) (Update: new toys, complete with photos, blogged about here.)

3. Expanding services. When I started, I only did primarily vanilla services that were standard to my personal sexual preferences. The first thing I experimented with was anal sex. I still wish that I could accommodate every cock at all velocities, but since I can accommodate the majority of clients I have found that it’s been a lot of fun and a big hit. I do still worry that when I have to invoke “at discretion” and apologetically decline to do it that clients will feel as if I have tricked them. I know that it’s not uncommon for girls to offer something “at discretion” and then never actually deliver. However, with anal, this is honestly the case for me.

The next thing I added was giving water sports. I used to decline to do this but one day I decided to give it a go and the sight of a handsome footballer greedily drinking my pee was very gratifying! I do wish I had a bigger bathtub, though! I may experiment with using the bathroom floor and a couple of towels so that this isn’t an issue. After all, a tiled floor and towels are easily cleaned!

(Update: I am frequently asked what services I do NOT offer and I have blogged about some of that here.)

The means by which I do this sensual cleaning is hot towels. You know how on airplanes or at Indian restaurants you are given a hot, wet towel to freshen up? I was at a spa not too long ago where these were used and I noticed the woman kept them warm in a slow cooker. “I can do that!” I thought. And so I have lovely fresh towels ready for cleaning up (before and after the fun). No more slimy cold wet wipes!

4. The final – and possibly the most important – thing I have done to improve customer satisfaction has been to get new photos. When I started, I had nobody to take photos for me. I am not a particularly photogenic person. I always look as if I have just seen a spider behind the photographer’s head. So I went to a “boudoir” photographer. She was very helpful in terms of helping me pose and had lots of props and backdrops to work with. The session also included professional hair and makeup. However, professional lighting + very high resolution lenses means photos must be airbrushed a bit. Otherwise, all you’ll see is PORES and LINES and SPOTS to the point of distraction. (In real life, we are in motion and therefor naturally “blurred.”) So, they were airbrushed. Combined with the professional hair and makeup, they weren’t really accurate representations of what I look like. I have made a real effort to get the best amateur photos I possibly can. I have enlisted the help of friends and obliging clients and managed to get photos that I feel really do look like me. You don’t see the bad shots, of course (the ones where my hair is doing something weird or I look like I’ve just stubbed my toe) but they are not retouched and they’re all recent.

Speaking of flattering photos, there is one last thing I would like to do to: I want to feel confident about my body. My regulars assure me that they think I’m beautiful. They say they understand that I’m a middle-aged MILF (that is, a woman who has given birth) and so they’re not as bothered about my belly as I am. I have been very shy about this and I think it probably impedes my performance in bookings to some degree. I’ve read many, many times that men are turned on by sexy confident women and not bothered by the little flaws that we think they are. So, I’m going to upload a photo that I love – except for the fact that it shows my belly in a less than flattering light. There you go – you can see the little extra “flab” on my abdomen. There’s no point in pretending it isn’t there. And if you don’t like it, then fair enough. I’d rather you knew now than after you’d paid your hard-earned.

Cleanliness… just something I’ve been thinking about.

I’ve been thinking about cleanliness, lately. And not so much about my client’s hygiene – although I obviously prefer when men are freshly showered, I have a shower they can use if it’s been a hectic day.

I’m talking about myself, and my incall flat. I know that clients sometimes wonder how clean escorts keep themselves, as they imagine we go from man to man with scarcely a break in between. That may be true of some girls in some busy massage parlours or brothels. But an independent escort can set her own schedule. I never book clients back-to-back. Not only is this asking for trouble when people inevitably run late or show up early, but it also doesn’t leave enough time to freshen up, check messages, grab a bite to eat, and generally recharge for the next visitor. I shower before every client because I’m always anxious to be fresh and clean for everyone I meet. Also, I don’t wear perfume, unless I know that the client won’t mind.

I also keep my flat very clean. In particular, I am very careful to have clean linens on my bed. I put a large sheet down on top of the bed, and that sheet goes straight into the laundry afterwards. I run the vacuum regularly, as well as dust and wipe down the bathroom. It really matters to me that my flat is comfortable and clean so that the client can relax and enjoy himself.

I think most good independents are as conscientious as I am, although I have heard the odd horror story about squalid rooms or girls who don’t smell very fresh.

(So, Google searchbot thingies: please note that this Manchester escort keeps her city centre flat in good, clean nick and that this independent escort doing incalls and outcalls in Manchester is always squeaky-clean and fresh for every appointment.)

A day off!

I suppose I need to stop buying sandwiches and poncy salads from Tesco express as they are probably the culprit behind my waking up with an upset tummy this morning. I get to spend the day at home watching movies in front of the fire. I’m going to catch up on all the new-to-me releases on Virgin On Demand.

I like some pretty dumb movies. I like horror movies, but not slasher ones like Saw. I am also a sucker for romantic comedies. And action! I do love some action movies, although there aren’t that many very good ones.

Someone asked me what my five favourite movies were and I just drew a blank at the time. Since then, I’ve mulled it over and I think they are:

MILF, Manchester Escort
Every MILF’s dream…

1. Die Hard. This movie is perfect. The plot is perfect. The acting is great. It’s exactly what an action movie should be. Sure, shit blows up, but it relies primarily on plot and characters to be entertaining. By the way, Air Force One is pretty much the same movie on an airplane and I love that one, too.

2. Gone With The Wind. Because it’s Gone With The Wind and I’m a girl. Duh.

Mature Escort, Tall escort
Yeah, I know I’m pretty…

3. True Romance. What a cast! And has there ever been a finer performance than the stand-off between Clarence and Drexel? White Boy Day indeed!

“That boy is good!”

4. Coming To America. I never, ever get tired of this silly movie and I’ve probably watched it thirty times. I probably know every line. No matter! It’s always funny. SEXUAL CHOCOLATE!

5. Huh… picking number five is hard! OK. The Forty-Year-Old Virgin. I love all of Seth Rogan’s movies. I love the way there’s always a Judeo-Christian moral with a twist. This adds poignancy to them and sets them apart from the other crude boy-humour comedies.

So, I’m clearly not a very high-brow movie watcher. If I want a Henry James story then I will read a Henry James novel. When I’m sat in front of the boob tube, I want shit to blow up and the hero to say “Yippie-Ki-Yay Motherfucker.”

(Hello Google Bot Searching Thingies! Please disregard all that stuff about movies and pay close attention to what I’m about to say regarding my being an independent escort in Manchester who offers an enthusiastic GFE at her discrete and comfortable incall flat in Manchester city centre. Please rank me accordingly! Thank you!)

Toys! I bought some!

escort with toys, vibrator, anal
My favorite sex toy. Although small for its size it can be enjoyed by more than one person simultaneously…

My pal showed me a good sex shop today, over in the gay village. They’ve got a pretty decent range of toys and bondage gear at reasonable prices. I’ve been thinking of adding a few things to my repertoire and figured I’d start with a few simple toys. So, I have two vibrators, one small and slim and one larger and, well, shaped like a cock. Then, I got a roll of bondage tape. I thought it might be fun to do a bit of tie and tease for those gentlemen who want that. Apparently this stuff sticks only to itself and is useful for tying, blindfolding, etc. I’m keen to try it out!

I also have a couple of those little vibrating cock rings that are sold in every grocery store and pharmacy up and down the land. They’re actually a lot of fun. I like them when I’m on top and I can be a bit selfish and go really slowly and rub my clit against it.

I am a playful person who likes to try new things but a lot of the gear I saw there intimidated me. I suppose there are things I could learn, but I don’t want to rush into anything. I think the whips and paddles will have to wait a while!


I am! I am going to Hell!

I went ahead and bought the ticket to Hellfest. So that’s me going to France in June. Woo!

The ticket to the festival was priced in Euros so I don’t really know how much I paid. I know how much I paid for my flight to Nantes, though: too damned much. I just love when the booking site, after I’ve entered in my credit card info and clicked “purchase” comes back and tells me that the price has doubled with extra fees. But I went ahead and hit the “purchase” button again because I am too lazy to take a coach or a train.

I will have to purchase a tent and other necessary items in Clisson. This is not going to be the glamping I’m used to. But the bands I’m going to see are awesome!

So, that was my gift to myself. I didn’t get much else, other than several boxes of chocolates from the boys and a new Bill Bryson book called One Summer: America 1927. I love Bill Bryson and think his Notes From a Small Island should be issued to every expat Yank upon entering the country. Anyway, I am just about to start reading it, as I finished The Kreutzer Sonata this evening.

(Hello Google SEO Crawler Bot Thingies That I Don’t Understand! Herein lies the paragraph where I bang on about the fact that I am an escort in Manchester. Because I am an independent escort in Manchester City Centre. That is to say, I offer incall escort services at an incall location in Manchester city centre. I really don’t know what else to tell you, really. SLAYER!)

What I’m Reading Now

Being an independent escort in Manchester isn’t all glamour and excitement, you know. Sometimes I just sit around in my underwear waiting for the phone to ring. And while I can fritter away many an hour just fussing with my hair and commenting on the Metal Sucks blog, I do sometimes manage to read the odd book now and then.

Today I started to read The Kreutzer Sonata by Tolstoy. Miranda at Terrorizer Magazine told me it was her favourite book a few weeks back and I put it on my mental to-read list. It’s too early to say what I think of it, but I have high hopes for it. I’ve read Anna Karenina and The Death of Ivan Illych, but I didn’t get more than a hundred or so pages into War and Peace before life interfered and I had to set it down. It’s not the sort of book you can just pick up and leave off casually, and I’m going to have to set aside some real quality time before I start it, again. I’m not really in any hurry because I have the feeling that once I’ve read War and Peace, there’s never going to be another book as good and that will make me sad.

I would say that Anna Karenina is the best book I’ve ever read. I am not a great judge of literature and I’m not widely read, so my opinion probably doesn’t mean much. But I am in awe of Tolstoy’s writing. He writes like God. I am not even sure if there is a God, but reading Tolstoy makes me think there must be. He somehow knows things that he couldn’t possibly know. Like what it’s like to die, or what it’s like to nurse an infant. And he writes very simply. There are no fancy flourishes of writerly showmanship. Everything is very clear and very straightforward. He just seems to reflect an objective truth about life in every passage.

I’ve read some of his non-fiction as well. His Confession, which is an explanation of his life-long spiritual quest for religious truth, mirrored very closely that which is experienced by Levin in Anna Karenina. And I really enjoyed his book What is Art? He starts out attempting to define the word “art” and arrives at something along the lines of “art is the means by which a person uses sound, movement, words, shapes, colours or lines to transmit an emotion to another person.” I really should look up exactly what he wrote, but that book is downstairs and my bed is too cozy. I was just impressed at his ability to come up with a definition of “art” that seemed more satisfactory than any other attempt I’d ever read. And his description of an evening he spent watching an opera by Wagner had me laughing out loud. I am not entirely sure that I agreed with his entire argument, as it ends up saying that about the only worthwhile art is folk art, but I really enjoyed reading what he had to say.

Probably my favourite thing Tolstoy ever wrote, however, was an essay on Shakespeare. Until I read it, I thought that I was somehow fundamentally missing something because I just don’t see what the big deal about Shakespeare is. I thought that I must be somehow very stupid. But Tolstoy is clearly not stupid and this is what he had to say:

I remember the astonishment I felt when I first read Shakespeare. I expected to receive a powerful esthetic pleasure, but having read, one after the other, works regarded as his best: “King Lear,” “Romeo and Juliet,” “Hamlet” and “Macbeth,” not only did I feel no delight, but I felt an irresistible repulsion and tedium, and doubted as to whether I was senseless in feeling works regarded as the summit of perfection by the whole of the civilized world to be trivial and positively bad, or whether the significance which this civilized world attributes to the works of Shakespeare was itself senseless. My consternation was increased by the fact that I always keenly felt the beauties[5] of poetry in every form; then why should artistic works recognized by the whole world as those of a genius,—the works of Shakespeare,—not only fail to please me, but be disagreeable to me? For a long time I could not believe in myself, and during fifty years, in order to test myself, I several times recommenced reading Shakespeare in every possible form, in Russian, in English, in German and in Schlegel’s translation, as I was advised. Several times I read the dramas and the comedies and historical plays, and I invariably underwent the same feelings: repulsion, weariness, and bewilderment. At the present time, before writing this preface, being desirous once more to test myself, I have, as an old man of seventy-five, again read the whole of Shakespeare, including the historical plays, the “Henrys,” “Troilus and Cressida,” the “Tempest,” “Cymbeline,” and I have felt, with even greater force, the same feelings,—this time, however, not of bewilderment, but of firm, indubitable conviction that the unquestionable glory of a great genius which Shakespeare enjoys, and which compels writers of our time to imitate him and readers and spectators to[6] discover in him non-existent merits,—thereby distorting their esthetic and ethical understanding,—is a great evil, as is every untruth.

Wow! Bold words!

He then goes on to use King Lear as an example in order to point out what he considers ridiculous about Shakespeare’s plays. In short, he finds the characters and their actions too illogical to be even remotely believable. I suffered through King Lear at university and, while I wasn’t clever enough to recognise what I hated about it at the time (probably because I was too busy trying to figure out what the archaic language meant), I think I was underwhelmed because the entire story just seemed ridiculous and hysterical.

As is so often the case, I need someone far smarter than myself to tell me why I liked or didn’t like something. I will like or dislike according to my own tastes, but I cannot always identify what is making the impression upon me. I am not very good at analysing literature at all. Even the most profoundly affecting books have to slowly percolate through me over months and even years until I come across something or someone in my life that mirrors what I have gleaned from reading. Then I will think “Oh! He is just like that old preacher in Light in August!” and I will then understand both that person and the book where before I did not.

Gmail Nightmares!

When I started to set up this website and blog, I had a gmail address for it. But the fellow who was putting this together for me noticed something odd: the emails from my KimberlyC account were showing my real name as the sender! This is because of Google+ and adding an account, I guess. I thought it was as simple as logging out of one and into another, but there seems to be a glitch in Google that sort of mashes all the account information together. Even when I went into the settings and specified that it was to show “Kimberly C” as the sender’s name, it would still show my real name at random times.

So, I got an email address and thought no more about it.

Until today I sent an email from my primary/real name gmail address. My friend replied “What’s this kimberlycmanchester account? Do you have a new email?” OH DEAR LORD! Even though I’d sent the email from, they were arriving from “!”

I had to delete the entire email account. (So don’t email It no longer exists.) Which wasn’t easy. Google really wants to keep you from doing that but I finally prevailed. I hope this means that this will never happen again. Luckily I had barely used the account and so there were very few contacts I had to figure out how to transfer over to If I ever have to actually delete my primary email address, that will be such a massive pain in the ass that I may just give up using email altogether and become a luddite. I’ll bet luddites wear cool hats.

I warn anyone who has more than one Gmail account, especially those for whom privacy is important, to pay close attention so that this doesn’t happen to them. I don’t know what causes the bug, but Googling the issue did turn up some other people with similar problems. I doubt many of them are escorts, but we can’t be the only people who want totally separate, anonymous email accounts.

(I said, SEO crawler bot thingies, that it can’t only be Escorts in Manchester, or independent escorts, or escorts doing incall in Manchester who want to protect their privacy.)

Am I Going To Hell?

I really want to go to Hellfest in France next year… I mean, just look at this lineup:

hellfest 2014 bill

Slayer! And Carcass! And Hatebreed! And Goreguts! And… well, I won’t go on and on about it. Let’s just say that there are an awful lot of bands there that I’d love to see, and I’m not even really looking at the main stage. This thing is massive!

But it’s in France, in a town called Clisson near the west coast. How would I get there? More importantly, how would I get there with all my stuff? Because I am not one for roughing it. I like to take a big teepee, several self-inflating mats, duvets, a camping toilet, a couple of folding chairs, an ice cooler, and lots of clothes. I won’t be able to drive there so that would leave travelling by some sort of public transportation and that means travelling light. No can do.

But… I don’t know. I look at that line-up and I just want to buy my ticket and worry about the logistics later.

Maybe I’ll just vacillate and kvetch about it until the tickets are all sold out.

(And now the paragraph for the SEO bots in which I keep talking about how I’m an independent escort in Manchester who does incall as a Manchester escort. Because it’s very important that I keep harping on the fact that I am a Manchester Escort with an incall escort flat in Manchester City Centre. I think that should suffice.)

Still Haven’t Finished My Christmas Shopping!

I have been so busy that I haven’t noticed how quickly Christmas has come upon us this year… and I still haven’t finished my shopping!

I’m sitting here in Manchester City Centre with all the shops close at hand but whenever I venture into them, the mobs of people make it about impossible to actually make any purchases. This serves me right. I should have been buying presents all throughout the year like a sensible person. I’m just going to have to suck it up and get in there and throw a few elbows. You know, get into the holiday spirit.

I’ve Become One of The Smug (?)

You know how Apple enthusiasts are so darned smug about their gadgets? Today I became one of them. I’ve had an iPod for a few months, although I still use Android phones, but I have just switched from Windows 8 on a Toshiba laptop to a MacBook Pro.

It started today when I purchased VIP tickets for next year’s Bloodstock festival. I had a great time last year sleeping in a tent and using the most primitive facilities, but this year I fancy sleeping in a tent that’s close to my car, has access to proper flushing toilets and hot showers, and will apparently give me entry to some sort of la-di-da private VIP bars where (I’ll bet very few of) the performers hang out. I don’t care about the VIP private bar stuff. I’m just willing to pay double the normal ticket price if it means I can get to my car quickly, use real toilets that flush, and have hot showers every day. Because when I see Carcass I like to have my legs shaved. Just in case. You never know: Jeff Walker could do a Bruce Springsteen and pull me up on the stage and have me dance to “Genital Grinder” with him. I need to be at my very best.

So I went to the Bloodstock website but I couldn’t log on. The page just wouldn’t load. I checked my internet connection and it was fine. Facebook and Gmail were updating just fine, but almost any new page I tried to load just wouldn’t open at all.

It was the final straw. I bought the cheap Toshiba laptop in the summer and it has been nothing but headaches ever since. I blame Windows 8, mostly, but I think some of it may be a hardware issue as well. Such as the way the WiFi keeps dropping and diagnostics I run tell me there’s a cable loose (there is not.) Whatever, I do not have the time or patience to sort out what is wrong with my laptop and I really cannot afford to suffer connectivity problems.

So, I went to PC World and bought a MacBook Pro. I used to use only Macs, back in the very early 90’s when I started working in music journalism. Tim Yo taught me how to use a computer at Maximum RocknRoll magazine, in fact, and so Macs were my very first exposure to computing. I had an iMac (a big round orange bubble) as late as 2001. But it’s been a while for me and so I have to reacclimate to the Apple way of doing things.

So far, there’s been a lot of setting up and updating and I still have to figure out how to sync my entire iTunes library and get important image files transferred over. Then I intend to wipe the Toshiba and give it to one of my boys for Christmas.

In the meantime, I have managed to purchase my VIP ticket to Bloodstock and so will be as fresh and fragrant as a rose for the entire event.

(Oh, hey, Google SEO crawling bot thingies! You just never know but Jeff Walker might do a search for such terms as Manchester Escorts, or maybe Independent Escort in Manchester, or perhaps he wants a GFE in Manchester, mayhap he would Google for an incall in Manchester. Why, he might even want a sensual massage from an escort twice his height in Manchester! Whatever it is that man wants, I have it and I sure do hope his Google searches lead straight to me. Got it?)

And now my site is live!

It may not be the slickest site, but I’m pleased with it and grateful to the person who helped me to make it and host it for a very reasonable price.

I’ve been relying primarily on a profile on Adultwork, and I hope to be able to use this site and blog to reach more people and show my personality in a way that isn’t always possible on AW.

I’ve got a lot of work to do over the next couple of weeks, including working on my twitter account and linking my site to a few good escort directories. And blogging!

Speaking of which, someone told me that I ought to fill my blogs with phrases like “Manchester independent escort” “GFE Manchester” “incall Manchester” and whatever other potential search terms there could be. I’m not entirely sure how SEO works or if I’m ever actually going to turn up on the first page of Google but I figure it doesn’t hurt to give it a try. And so I just did!

What should an escort blog about, anyway?

I asked some other girls what they blog about and they gave a variety of answers. Some just stick to the subject of their escorting. Others blog about their general interests.

I like the idea of just blogging about anything that comes to mind and so I hope that people will enjoy reading it.

My interests include literature, hill walking, and heavy metal music. I will write about those topics, and anything else that I feel like talking about.

Hello world – First post of a Mature Independent Escort in Manchester

Mature Independent Escort in Manchester
KimberlyC: mature Manchester independent escort

Hello, and welcome to my new website! I think this page was automatically generated when the website was built. What a waste of a page. I thought about deleting it but I doubt anyone will read it one way or the other. I am going to use it to practice on, and see what I can do with search terms. I’m going to use this page to work on the term “mature independent escort in Manchester.”

A problem with “Mature Independent Escort in Manchester”

I am up against a lot of stiff competition on these sorts of search terms and while I think I have to pay attention to one or two broader terms, I really ought to concentrate on the sort of terms that are more unique to me.

I suppose I should start working on “Tall Escort in Manchester” and “Tall Independent Escort.” I am never going to win out against the big directories for those who are searching for something as generic as an escort in Manchester. However, I am the first result in searches for American escorts in Manchester. Surely it would make more sense to highlight the fact that I am tall and mature?

I also specialise in using toys – like vibrators, dildos, and anal toys – during bookings and so maybe I should work a bit on that sort of thing.

Honestly, it probably doesn’t matter all that much. Most of my traffic comes from directories like Punterlink and Vivastreet, where my website works as supplementary marketing. High-quality clients are the ones who read the advert thoroughly, often going so far as to click through to the personal website and reading the blog. I’m not sure how much actual business I will see from organic searches. Surely, the vast, vast majority of men who do searches are going to click through to the directories where they can see a great many escorts at once.

Mature American Escort in England… visiting a city near you soon!