Resolved to have a Happy New Year

I’ve never been one to make New Year’s resolutions, but there’s something about the fresh start of a new year – be it the calendar date or the solstice/holidays – that puts me in a mind of evaluating what I’m doing and thinking of things I can change for the better.

My first year was about learning what works for me and what works for my clients. I have received plenty of positive feedback, but I have also gotten some critical feedback that, while discomfiting, really did help me to improve my services. I don’t see the point of doing a job unless I’m going to do it to the best of my abilities. Yes, I do find sex with strangers fun and interesting, but if I’m not continually seeking ways to do new and interesting things, I will start to become bored and then the fun will leach out of the experience. And if I’m not having fun, chances are neither are you!

Things that I have done to improve customer satisfaction:

1. Lots of new outfits and lingerie. For a little while, I found it off-putting to get requests on how to dress. It seemed to me that being asked to wear very specific things (often things I don’t even own, and at short notice) was somehow infringing on my autonomy and detracting from a service based on spontaneous expression of my sexuality. But after giving it some thought I decided to embrace this and make creatively meeting fantasies and requests part of my sexuality. Yes, changing into suspenders and stockings at short notice can be a faff (the greater the hurry, the more twisted the straps!) but having a variety of things that make me feel sexy on hand and seeing them as part of my sexual expression makes it fun. And if I don’t have something to hand or there’s no time to lace up the corset, then I will just say so without any guilt. Clients are almost always understanding!

2. Lots of new toys. I don’t actually care for masturbating with a vibrator when I’m enjoying myself alone. I’m happy with just my hands. But bringing toys into mutual play has been a lot of fun. And my toys aren’t just things that go “bzzzz” – I also have a few things to tickle, pinch, or smack with and it’s a real kick to see how clients respond to these things (when they want them!) (Update: new toys, complete with photos, blogged about here.)

3. Expanding services. When I started, I only did primarily vanilla services that were standard to my personal sexual preferences. The first thing I experimented with was anal sex. I still wish that I could accommodate every cock at all velocities, but since I can accommodate the majority of clients I have found that it’s been a lot of fun and a big hit. I do still worry that when I have to invoke “at discretion” and apologetically decline to do it that clients will feel as if I have tricked them. I know that it’s not uncommon for girls to offer something “at discretion” and then never actually deliver. However, with anal, this is honestly the case for me.

The next thing I added was giving water sports. I used to decline to do this but one day I decided to give it a go and the sight of a handsome footballer greedily drinking my pee was very gratifying! I do wish I had a bigger bathtub, though! I may experiment with using the bathroom floor and a couple of towels so that this isn’t an issue. After all, a tiled floor and towels are easily cleaned!

(Update: I am frequently asked what services I do NOT offer and I have blogged about some of that here.)

The means by which I do this sensual cleaning is hot towels. You know how on airplanes or at Indian restaurants you are given a hot, wet towel to freshen up? I was at a spa not too long ago where these were used and I noticed the woman kept them warm in a slow cooker. “I can do that!” I thought. And so I have lovely fresh towels ready for cleaning up (before and after the fun). No more slimy cold wet wipes!

4. The final – and possibly the most important – thing I have done to improve customer satisfaction has been to get new photos. When I started, I had nobody to take photos for me. I am not a particularly photogenic person. I always look as if I have just seen a spider behind the photographer’s head. So I went to a “boudoir” photographer. She was very helpful in terms of helping me pose and had lots of props and backdrops to work with. The session also included professional hair and makeup. However, professional lighting + very high resolution lenses means photos must be airbrushed a bit. Otherwise, all you’ll see is PORES and LINES and SPOTS to the point of distraction. (In real life, we are in motion and therefor naturally “blurred.”) So, they were airbrushed. Combined with the professional hair and makeup, they weren’t really accurate representations of what I look like. I have made a real effort to get the best amateur photos I possibly can. I have enlisted the help of friends and obliging clients and managed to get photos that I feel really do look like me. You don’t see the bad shots, of course (the ones where my hair is doing something weird or I look like I’ve just stubbed my toe) but they are not retouched and they’re all recent.

Speaking of flattering photos, there is one last thing I would like to do to: I want to feel confident about my body. My regulars assure me that they think I’m beautiful. They say they understand that I’m a middle-aged MILF (that is, a woman who has given birth) and so they’re not as bothered about my belly as I am. I have been very shy about this and I think it probably impedes my performance in bookings to some degree. I’ve read many, many times that men are turned on by sexy confident women and not bothered by the little flaws that we think they are. So, I’m going to upload a photo that I love – except for the fact that it shows my belly in a less than flattering light. There you go – you can see the little extra “flab” on my abdomen. There’s no point in pretending it isn’t there. And if you don’t like it, then fair enough. I’d rather you knew now than after you’d paid your hard-earned.